Oh what a suprise!!

Suddenly Newscrap Inc are interested in buying a 7.5% stake in Fairfax! Poised to own 15% (pretty much a controlling interest) as soon as the new media laws take effect. Soon all of Australia will be like South Australia, where the daily National, regional and weekly local papers (perhaps with Rural Press being the exception) are all owned by Newscrap!

PLEASE* vote this government out next election - they are doing dodgy dodgy things now that they hold the balance of power (not like we didn't see this coming).

*I realise I am most probably pleading to the converted

What big eyes you have!

My baby boy has big blue eyes - I know this not only from looking, but because I am told it at least once a day... (Excuse the dribble to the right of his mouth - he can't help it, as he isn't likely to work out that he needs to swallow saliva for a year or so yet...)

One nice thing is that the other day, I got at least 5 similar comments from YOUNG MEN! Usually it's the grandparents, women of childbearing age or fathers who acknowledge babies. I was tempted to reply "What, getting clucky!?", but didn't want to freak their girlfriends out.

Also interesting is that yesterday I saw the lead singer/keyboard player of a well known band pushing a pram (with baby in it) into a hi fi store.

Also, found this show on Thursday fascinating. Food for thought anyway.

What's my point? I dunno. Do I need one? I think today I prefer to have a theme.

visit from folks and the joys of Japlish

My folks visited last week on their way back from visiting the Tokyo Meri's, bearing gifts and tales of their two grandsons over there.

Mum & Dad spent 3 weeks looking after nephew #1 (3.5 y/o) while Brother, Sister-in-law and nephew #2 (8 weeks old and still in hospital but almost better) coped with new jobs and commute-to-hospital-to-breastfeed schedules. Brother's new job has much more family-friendly hours so yahoo for him! Mum apparently refined her Advanced Toddler Reasoning and Bribing skills (you know - "you can have another chip once you've had a mouthful of chicken and broccoli").

Gifts include little clips and gizmos for attaching things to prams, attaching hats and dummies to babies, small cases for storing rolled up damp flannels with a little cartoon character on the front called "Wanco". Bags with mutated South Park characters all over it, and words of wisdom such as "Happy Day We are good friends! A breath of fresh air! Love begets love Tast (sic) the goody Fresh and crispy Strawberry A sound mind in a sound lody (sic)" (all on one bag). And some pretty groovy t-shirts that miraculously fit me despite vastly different Japanese sizing system.

all thumbs

The last few days has been like a slapstick Laurel and Hardy skit. Or Laurel, without Hardy. E.g. hang up the towell after shower. Towell falls to ground immediately. Pick towell up and put it back, towell falls down AGAIN!! Pick towell up, put it back and hold it there... hold... hold... and it finally stays. Put something in bin, swinging bin top swings straight back and pushes rubbish back out.

Does anyone else feel like a bit of a clutz when they get their periods? (This is, I might add, my first one in over a year, and I have not missed them one bit).

Cryin'

Two little babies in their prams at the chemists, with tear stains down their cheeks, and the quiet, shy and snuggly stare that seems to follow a baby's howl. Not wanting to go outside and was perfectly fine inside thankyou? Resisting sleep? Cries of frustration from not being able to say what they want?

Small park in the back streets just off the main road. Woman on a bench, dabbing at her eyes with a tissue, while a friend sits beside her with her arm around her shoulder, consoling, listening. Too much going on in her life and finding it hard to cope? Did someone die in an unexpected way? Debrief after a difficult end to a relationship? Disappointing news or a disappointing person?

Late at night, all is silent. Then, through the concrete brick walls we hear the faint sound of muffled sobbing. We hold our breaths and listen. In fact, it is someone crying really hard... the type of cry where you have to take massive inward breaths between sobs because you are crying so hard. The sort of cry that must be expressing the deepest disappointment, grief, or loneliness, and the only way to let it out is to have a big cry when you are somewhere safe and alone, or with people who you can let see you like this...

Q: How do three mums with 4 month olds go swimming?

A: Like this...

We arrive at the pool at a pre-arranged time and take turns, taking into account the following factors that pop up randomly throughout the morning. Well, not completely random, as each baby has it's own cycle of things it does, but throw 3 babies together and you do have the potential for mahem... One by one we take turns to swim or shower. Do a few laps as fast as you can, then look towards the other mums for a thumbs up to let you know that everything is OK with Bub...

The Babies
Ethan, Lachlan and Phoebe: all born within a week of each other*. I wouldn't exactly call them friends yet - they barely even look at each other. Babies at this age "parallel play" so I'm told, and evidence as I see it suggests that apart from accidentally knocking each other as they flail around on rugs, there isn't a lot of interaction going on.

Feeding...
Phoebe is the model baby feeder. Never a problem with latching on or her mother's supply. Comfortable feeding wherever she is. Lachie is also breastfed but going through "a bit of a difficult phase"... won't feed away from his special chair at home. Mum has to feed him before departing her house, and tries to feed him while out, but he won't and cries his little lungs out. And Ethan. Well he's always been a difficult feeder... his latest trick is to get halfway through his bottle and start to look around. Neck craning every direction, looking out to see what he can see, with Mum's hand and the bottle trying to follow his mouth around. There tend to be a few tantrums, and he seems to be making the mental transition to wanting to be fed sitting up, which doesn't quite work with a bottle.

Sleeping...
Phoebe also seems to be well adjusted to being out and about in her pram. [The rest of the mothers actually don't actually believe she is capable of being grizzly, but I can confirm that she does actually grizzle on occasion.] Lachie hates his pram, so his mother has to cart arount a baby carrier as well as a pram in case of emergency. Ethan can be difficult to settle, but just zonks if he's tired.

Separation anxiety?
Phoebe & Ethan: none apparent at this age - willing to cuddle anyone so long as Mum's in the vicinity. Lachie seems a little less at ease, but could be due to not having been fed for a while.

Coffee and chats afterwards....
Kiddies settled somewhat now that Mums have all swum and showered, we grabbed a substandard coffee at the pool afterwards. We realised that all our kids are Geminis, and got into a great big in depth discussion about intra-familial star sign relationships. Parents vs babies, us vs our parents and friends. Wondering how our babes are going to grow up. Thinking it would be cool if they went to the Newtown High School for the Performing Arts and dyed their hair pink.

So gradually, I'm getting fitter again back in the pool. It's great hanging out with other Mums, sharing the trials and joys of parenthood, seeing how other babies are, and being reassured that your baby fits somewhere in the many spectrums of normality.

*their mothers said they could be sister and brother... but sadly no one called Deborah (Pulp reference for those who know the song)

Hello back again did you miss me?

The last week has been a bit of a blur. C-chan's back is getting better (thank goodness). Things were getting quite panicky for me last Sunday... I suppose I was beginning to look ahead into the coming weeks and wonder how we were going to cope if things didn't show signs of improving. Having to run around doing everything for 2 people was taking its toll. In addition my socia life was almost entirely with the ladies from the pharmacy as I ducked down to fill prescriptions for C-chan's pain relief. On the up side, C-chan has caught up with a lot of reading which he hasn't had time for in the past few months.

Some friends were lovely and offered help or even brought over food - thanks. C-chan's parents flew over (even though we didn't make it to C-chan's graduation ceremony) and gave the place a once over with the duster and vacuum cleaner (it really needed it) and even brought frozen pasta sauce and quiche for us to stash in the freezer. I think I might explore internet grocery shopping in the coming weeks - for the large heavy items that I can't pick up easily down the road.

We had dinner at home instead on Monday night and celebrated the end of C-chan's neverending law degree with orange juice in our champagne glasses. E-chan wore the little mortar board hat I'd made for him and it actually turned out to be a surprise for C-chan (I could have sworn he'd seen it as it was being made).

As it is now, we got C-chan out of the house to have an ice-cream with Angel on Friday and to the Osteopath yesterday. And he can do lots of little things around the house which makes a huge difference. Now all I have to do is all of the lifting and carrying around of our little bundle of joy. Not suprisingly, I am being ULTRA CAREFUL that I don't do my back in also. That would be a disaster. I think we've learned our lesson that our health cannot take a back seat even though E-chan keeps us busy. We were doing a lot of walking, but it seems walking is not enough - C-chan's getting a gym membership for xmas, and back in the pool I go...

Eat your heart out Florence...

Nightingale that is.

Unlikely to post for a while - now not only have a baby to care for but also a fully grown man whose back is not behaving itself. The following would be great:

- the number for rent-an-auntie (you know, the kind who pops around with a casserole so you don't have to cook for a few nights, and whips around with the vacuum cleaner, and minds the baby while you pop out for those much needed groceries)

- a genie (but everyone knows they don't really exist)

- my mum (currently in Japan, looking after my brother's family)

- C-chan's Mum (coming for a brief period next week for what would have been C-chan's graduation but it looks like he'll miss the ceremony now)

See you when I come up for air.

Bitch with an itch

For those of you who haven't seen me, I must reveal that I am one to suffer from the eczema. At certain times of the year (such as now, the hayfever season...), my skin flares up on some obvious places... around my eyes and on my throat, and on my hands. And like any condition that is obvious, people think that gives them a licence to offer (extremely) unqualified advice... From people I know, this can be a bit torturous - I have to smile and nod and wait until the conversation reaches its natural end, all the while bearing in mind that they care and are only trying to help. However, complete strangers, who I can only think don't give a toss about me, still throw me their two bobs worth.

I have never resorted to saying point blank "I don't want to talk about it and don't want your amateur advice", but sometimes I get close after an extremely frustrating set of "suggestions". The conversation usually starts like this:

"Oooh! what's that rash on your (insert body part)?"
"Eczema"
"Oh!" (pause while they think.... here it comes, any second now....) "Have you tried (insert wonder cure-all that I just MUST try)?"

My answer is either "yes", "yes but it doesn't work for me" or "no, but that is for another skin condition such as soriasis which is a different disease altogether". And by now, my physical reaction to them broaching the topic is usually the equivalent to a cat having their back arched, hair on end, and claws clenched.

But sadly, the conversation rarely ends there! These people seem to always get me pinned where I can't get away... at a meeting where I'm temporarily standing away from the group doing something, when I'm changing E-chan's nappy, when I'm purchasing something from their shop... otherwise I'd just smile politely and go somewhere else.

"My sister in law's cousin tried blahdy-blah blah and it worked a treat" (good for her)
"Is it itchy?" (no I'm just scratching as a conversation starter)
"I hear these kinds of conditions are linked to stress" (you can piss right off right now and stop making judgements about my mental condition)

I have decided I need a change in approach to nip this conversation on the bud before it starts. I have tried everything over the years to get people to shut up about it, and I can honestly say noone giving this unasked-for advice ever has any experience with persistent adult eczema, nor has offered any advice that has helped. Lately I have taken to asking them what they know about the condition and lecturing them with the latest, and that there are three broad aspects to being eczema-free:-

- not being born with the genes that seem to make you vulnerable

- avoiding the cause (for me, mostly airborn allergens such as dustmites, ryegrass pollen, mould, and possibly some food chemicals found in processed AND natural foods, avoiding which is impossible to do without living in a bubble!)

- then giving your many layers of skin a chance to grow through undamaged by avoiding irritants (have you ever tried not using any detergents?), and constantly moisturising with unscented emolients which from trial and error you find don't make matters worse.

Strangely, perhaps realising that getting rid of eczema isn't straightforward, at this point they do tend to shut up...

The Amazing Nighttime Adventures of Microman

It's 4.00am, and Mother was awoken by Microman making noises in his cot in the next room. In her half asleep state, she waited a minute or two to see whether something really is the matter, or whether Microman has simply decided it was time to have a play*. Microman made a few odd sounds, so Mother decided it was time to get up and investigate. She wearily pads over to Microman's room...

"Oooh! I didn't leave you like that when I put you to bed!!" exclaimed Mother, astounded to find Microman at a 90 degree angle to his normal sleeping direction, and half way up his cot!! In addition, he was completely uncovered!
"Gooo!" cooed Microman, with a cute upside-down smile, then proceeded to suck at his hands. He was completely happy!

Mother picked him up for a quick cuddle to help resettle him before rewrapping him for sleep, then decided to check his nappy. Microman wriggled like crazy on the change table, writhing from left to right, kicking up his legs and lifting up his bum. All the while, Microman made such cute noises and pulled such adorable faces that Mother found it very hard to not crack a smile herself**.

Finally, Mother re-wrapped Microman in his cotton wrap, stroked his adorable little head, put on some soothing noises to help him to sleep, and headed back to bed. Hopefully, there would be a few more hours of sleep before he awoke again, wanting to play and then feed...


*E-chan has recently taken to waking up at this unsociable hour for no other reason than to play. He's not hungry because he doesn't cry out for food, but sometimes does require a nappy change...
** This is the cardinal rule of what not to do when trying to settle a child who needs to get some sleep but is being stubborn and verging into "overtired" territory. They are so encouraged by this that they think it really is time to play...

------------------

The fun is starting... E-chan is learning to move where he wants to go, and is only a few days from being able to roll onto his tummy. Soon the days of finding him where I left him will be gone forever!!

testing the boundaries

Wow - we must be getting into the swing of this parenthood thing for now*.

On Friday I went out with another mum and it was the FIRST TIME I have been away from E-chan for more than about an hour. Yep - I nipped away once to have my hair cut, and another time for an appointment regarding my post-natal gumpy leg (which is fine now, thanks). And a few short trips to the shop for milk or take-away. The rest of the time, he has been sleeping only metres away from me in his cot or in the pram. So how did it go? OK. I missed him a bit, but knew he was in C-chan's capable hands. Luckily, just about everyone I was with had at least one child, and it was a sympathetic environment to be in. So it seems I can have the odd night out without baby for now*.

On top of that, we completed E-chan's transition from bassinet to cot (he was waking up headbutting the end of the bassinet sometimes, which was worrying us given babies generally have no skull at the top of their heads for the first year of life). We moved his room around to improve the layout somewhat. He seems to love his cot for now*!!

We also cleaned out the flat, vacuumed, washed, cooked AND we entertained! Dr J and Angel were brave enough to be dinner guests given the potential for screaming baby, however, E-chan was contented it seems and just fed and slept after 8:30 or so, and goo'd and gaa'd for the rest of the time they were over. So it seems we can entertain at home for now*.

We also made it out to Parramatta way for a BBQ a few weeks back which indicates slightly longer trips out to visit friends is managable for now*.

Today, for our biggest challenge yet, we'll go to a mums and bubs session at the movies. Not sure how E-chan will manage, as he can be one of the squirmiest babies I know when awake. Wish us luck...


* nb always insert "for now" as disclaimer, as babies seem to change habits just as you are working out what their routines are...

Big fambilies

Last night, I went out with a new friend who's from a HUUUUGE family. I realised that large families have mystified me in the past somewhat. I come from a smallish family (4) that is geographically isolated from cousins, granparents, aunties, Uncles etc. Close, but small.

People from large families always have things to go to on the weekend, and it seems they can never fit you into their schedule. If you're lucky you'll see them once or twice a year, fleetingly, and everyone else will be trying to talk to them too so you end up only talking to them for a few minutes. They run away to Vegas to get married instead of having to invite 300 guests to their wedding, which is understandable (I know 2 couples from large families who have done this now!). Little old me has often thought of these busy people: "oh, they don't really want to see me, they have enough people in their life already...".

Last night I went to a lingerie* party with a new friend who has a little bub a few weeks older than E-chan and lives around the corner. She's a warm person, who seems to have a lot of friendliness to offer everyone. Party was mostly populated with her cousins or cousin's partners - turns out she has 26 cousins and three siblings. Her family christmas gatherings usually have 40 or so adults plus however many kids in attendance. I suppose what I'm realising is that if you are from a big happy family, you can just make more room for people in your life. You are accustomed to a lot of people knowing about what is going on in your life. Kind of like my parents making room for each new grandchild in their life - each of them is "gorgeous", "precious" and cuddleable.

I've never wanted a big family for various reasons, but I'm beginning to see the good bits. I'm aiming for a big family of people who aren't necessarily related to me... Lots of alternative role models for E-chan etc etc.

* ridiculously expensive despite skipping retail floor space step in supply chain, therefore didn't buy anything.

Unexpected delights of parenthood

Warm, soft, little heads against your cheeks... big, wide toothless grins... smooth smooth skin... recognition of you before anyone else as a person who can stop their cries with a cuddle... being told they look like you... baby talk... having their little heads go heavy on your shoulder or chest when they fall asleep... smiling at you when half-asleep and...
watching them asleep in their cot...
:)

Transformative cover versions...

I get tickled pink when an artist takes a song, gives it a thorough makeover, and ends up with another version of the song that makes you think about the intended meaning of the lyrics, laugh with delight, twists the gender around or is just a damn lot better than the original.

Here's a few cover versions that stand out to me - feel free to add some of your own...(and here's hoping I don't break any of Betty Sue's reviewing rules along the way):

Winners!

Stop! in the name of love: Bang Gang recently did a version of this 60's Supremes hit. Instead of a soul music style, it's got a jangly guitar and folky voice; and the lyrics don't change, but it's sung by a man. Result: you're not sure if the male singer is in a relationship with a bisexual male or female. I find this version catchier than the original, and have sung along to it in the car many times.

Respect: Imagine my suprise when I found out that the first to record this song was not soul diva Aretha Franklin, but soul king Otis Redding. The original version was a bit of a suprise to me: imagine a bombastic fast paced soul track, with fast trumpets and trombones in between phrases, with words along the lines of: "you betta show me some respect woman, havin' dinner ready when I get home late at night..." (making it up here, but you get the picture - this guy was stuck in the Dark Ages...) Then along comes Aretha. Loosens up the song, slows the tempo, adds some female backing singers.... Transforms the whole song into an anthem for the feminist movement, that sticks two fingers up at the original version of the song. Pure genius.

Comfortably Numb: Never was much into "Prog Rock", therefore only have some vague memory of the original Fink Ployd version of the song from some long distant ex-boyfriend's CD collection. I think it was a bit slow and guitary, with smokey vocals. Enter the Scissor Sisters, with their fast castrato vocal disco Bee Gees style version that makes you want to dance around the lounge room (well if that's the only place you tend to dance these days).

Ticket to Ride: This Beatles classic was always about someone worrying that their love was one-sided; that any minute, their lover was going to take off with someone else. But it was somewhat disguised by the edgy rock and roll beat, and managed to sound almost euphoric. Then along came The Carpenters*. Piano background, slower pace, and Karen Carpenters' perfectly enunciated, pure as snow melancholic voice... "I think I'm gonna be sad, I think it's today... the boy who's driving me mad is going away... He's got a ticket to ride, and he don't care...". This version is perfect for rainy afternoons spent reminiscing about relationships of yesterday...

Hard Rain: This straightly-delivered, folky song of Bob Dylan's was given a good going over by Bryan Ferry. You'd never notice it was written as a protest against the Vietnam war - instead, this version of the song is done in a kind of glam/doo-wop style. With electric guitars, female backing vocalists, and an even 4:4 beat. Kind of in the same style as Leonard Cohen's "First we take Manhatten".

One Man Guy: Loudon Wainwright wrote this song about being his own man. A generation later, his son Rufus Wainright recorded the song, but Rufus' sexual orientation lends a new meaning to the words, implying that he is singing about fidelity; not being the type to sleep around.


Duds

Something: We were rifling through C-chan's father's Frank Sinatra record set and found a record from later in Sinatra's career where he murders I mean covers this Beatles song. It's plain awful. Treacley, pompous and stilted. Shouldn't have messed with the original, which captures beautifully the feelings and insecurities of being in the earlier phases of a love affair. Perhaps Sinatra was too big and famous at this stage to remember what it was like to be insecure?

I Got You Babe: I've added this one only because I want to have a whinge about UB40. I don't think the original Sonny and Cher version of this song is anything to blog home about, and hence don't think that UB40's version is comparatively worse. It's just that UB40 got away with being a $100-an-hour reggae style party band and not writing any of their own material. Well nothing that became a hit anyway. They do so many cover versions in this style that it becomes unimaginative (red red wine, I can't help falling in love with you etc etc).

*(we are not ashamed of our CD collection!!)